Happy Wednesday! Last week I did a wellness workshop for the women of Delta Phi Epsilon at Stevens Institute of Technology and wanted to share it with all of you too. The topic was self-love, and it has been discussed a lot recently in the health and wellness world. No matter where you look whether it’s on Well+Good, social media, or the internet – everyone is discussing it in one way, shape or form. Today I want to define what it is, what does it mean for each of you, and what are 10 things you can start doing to create your own self-love rituals to love yourself fully.

First, what is self-love? Self-love is defined as “the regard for one’s own well-being and happiness (chiefly considered as a desirable rather than narcissistic characteristic)”. I love that the dictionary adds the fact that it’s a positive rather than a selfish quality to possess. Personally, I know the times that I’ve needed self-love the most are often when I feel the lowest and I’m filled with recurring self-deprecating thoughts. Everyone feels this way – even the perfect health influencers, travel bloggers, or models you see on social media. No matter who you are, there are always going to be those moments that you doubt yourself and these are the times when you need to give yourself a big dose of self-love. Trust me, I’ve been there and will definitely be needing a tremendous amount of self-love over these next few months as I continue to grow my health coaching business. While I’m super excited, I know there will be lots of ups and downs so the things I will be recommending here are definitely things that I have already or will be incorporating into my own self-love routine.

Now, what does this mean for each of you? You may be sitting there thinking, everything is great – I love myself. This probably means that you have already established a self-love routine whether you realize it or not or maybe you are  just in a really great point in your life. With that, I’ll say that’s amazing and hopefully I’ll be able to give you a few other tips you can do to love yourself even more. For those of you that are going through a tough time, I want you to remember that it’s completely common and the more you start to love yourself, the better able you will be able to get through it. Have you ever heard the expression – “You can’t love another person until you love yourself first”? Well, it’s true. How can you expect other people to love the best version of you, if you don’t see it when you look in the mirror? Now let’s get into what are some of the things you can do to start loving yourself more when the hamsters are loose on those self-deprecating thoughts!

1. It’s okay to say “No”

For me, this has been difficult as I typically live by the mantra “half of life is just showing up.” However, the older I get, the more I realize that you need to pick and choose your battles because at the end of the day you need to take care of you. Remember, it’s okay if you have to say “no” to an event especially if you are feeling run down and exhausted or you know the situation will ultimately make you feel uncomfortable. 

2. Treat your skin kind by using organic products

If you don’t know this, your skin is your body’s largest organ. Make sure that you treat it well by using all natural, organic products that will help to nourish you. One of my favorite organic skincare lines is Cocokind. Their mission is to provide clean, conscious, and accessible skincare that empowers women. In addition, their products are made from superfoods. Loving yourself is as simple as using products that will be gentle on your skin, whether it’s a face mask once per week or using an organic daily moisturizer. Click here to see all of the Cocokind products I use/recommend as well as my other “little adapts” approved products! (*Note: I am not paid to promote Cocokind; I’m just a girl who cares about her skin and loves the product!)

3. Get some sleep

I know this might sound like a no brainer, but loving yourself means giving your body the right number of hours of sleep so your body can relax, repair and digest to be ready for the next day. For me, this means that I get myself into bed no later than 10:15 pm to allow myself to wake up fresh or power through a 5 am workout. The more you make an effort to get to bed early, the easier it will be to make it a routine and get the amount of sleep your body craves.

4. Meditate

Have you ever felt like you have a million things to do and don’t know where to begin? Just take a second to breathe in and out a few times and calm yourself. Meditating can be as easy as this or a 15 minute breathing exercise you do before bed. I’ll be honest, I don’t do enough meditating but in the moments that I’ve chosen to do it, it has definitely helped me to calm down and relax to conquer my next task.

5. Perspective

I wish I could take credit for this one, but I have to give all the credit to my husband, Will Smith. (Yes, that’s his name and no, he’s not the famous actor but it never gets old!) In those moments where you think everything is wrong, I ask you to take a moment to think about at least one thing you are grateful for. I’m sure you will have more than one, but focusing on these positive things will help you to realize that everything is not as bad as it seems.

6. Treat Yo’self

This might sound obvious, but don’t be afraid to do something small for yourself that will lift your spirits on a bad day. For example, it could be getting a manicure or treating yourself to a 10 minute massage. Don’t ever forget that you’re worth it and you deserve it! (Click here to watch this clip from Parks and Recreation if you want to better understand what it means – you won’t be disappointed!)

7. Make a “little adapt” to your diet each week

Your body is a temple so treat it that way! The best way to nourish your body and keep it working the way it is supposed to is by eating real, whole foods daily. The way I teach my clients to develop a healthy eating plan that works for them is by having them commit to one “little adapt” each week. Overtime, all of these “little adapts” will become their own, unique healthy lifestyle. If you need any help, please click here to reach out for a complimentary health consultation today!

8. Make a list of things you love about yourself

Too often we find ourselves focusing on the things we don’t like about ourselves and our bodies versus the things that we love. I would suggest writing a list of things that you love in a notebook or on your phone to keep for the next time you need a pick me up. This will help to remind you of all of the amazing things you truly love about yourself and should celebrate! This also goes hand-in-hand with not comparing yourself to anyone but YOU. You can spend your time trying to compare yourself to others, but it will never help you to move forward with your dreams and goals. Yes, you can definitely have role models and people you would like to emulate BUT the only way you should measure yourself is to your own milestones and successes. That is a true measure of your progress – not someone else.

9. Surround yourself with people who believe in you

This one I cannot encourage enough; surrounding yourself with the people who love you the most and support you no matter what is SO important. I know I wouldn’t be following my passion of becoming a health coach without the support of my family and close friends. With that being said, you also need to be ready to let go of those negative relationships that are holding you back. This is definitely not easy, but letting go and moving on from people who no longer serve you will only benefit you in the long-term.

10. Set a goal to accomplish each week

Lastly, you need to set goals in order to continue growing and loving yourself. It doesn’t have to be anything monumental or life changing, but could be something like trying a new workout class or going to a networking event to meet new people. Setting smalls goals overtime will help you to be successful with your long-term goals whether it be 3 months, 6 months, or a year from now. This will help to keep you motivated and positive because you are working towards something that YOU want to do.

To recap, loving yourself and having a self-love routine is very important to keep yourself happy and motivated. Whether you choose to incorporate 1 or 5 things from my list is completely up to you and at the end of the day, you know yourself best and what will work for you. I hope you will all take some time this week to show yourself some love because:

You are beautiful

You are kind

You are smart

You are lovely

You are gorgeous

You are amazing

You are phenomenal

You are worth it

You are perfect

You are strong

Love Always,
Jax